Wednesday, April 8, 2009

Pretend Students

So I have been tutoring in a community college biology class. This is a class I took last year, and recieved a very good A with lots of study. So to make a few extra bucks, I am now an SI, or supplemental instructor. Sort of like a GA for community college. I attend a class and thier labs, and lead study sessions once a week to try to help people pass. I am fed up with students giving no effort, and whining that they aren't passing. My boss at the assistant living home says it is becuase there is too easy of rewards, like kids in baseball, everyone gets a trophy, whether they won the championship (if they were even allowed to keep score, or if they were dead last. Everyone wins, no matter how much effort or success actually happened. So now we have produced students who actually think that just for paying for the class they should automatically pass (true quote!)

Here are the top ten signs that your students are not passing Biology 101:

10. the student, after not taking the first three oppurtunities, asks when there will be extra credit.

9. We are now in chapter 18. The student comes to you confused over the material from chapter 4.

8. The student has missed the first two lecture exams. 7 weeks later, asks if they can make them up.

7. there are 48 people enrolled, 17 show up, 3 leave during break

6. the student is "taking notes" on thier laptop, but actually talking on facebook

5. the student shows up for lab prac., having never been to a lab, and is in shock that there are tests for labs, and gets a 4 out of 50.

4. the student comes to you 9 weeks into the course, and asks why they are failing, "but I never fail!?" All you can say is "Who are you? I've never seen you before."

3. In lab, the student should be looking at a paramecium, and is focused on the interesting jagged edge of the glass slide under the microscope. Wait, was that an air bubble?

2. the student has not shown up for 4 weeks ("but I have doctor notes!"). We have been observing pond water. We ask if she has brought in her pond water sample. She looks in her FOLDER to see if she has it.

1. the student's mom calls to let you know they are in jail, and will be out for the next few weeks.

1 comment:

  1. Oh man. #2 is superb. I just have to take a minute to let that resonate in my brain.